Sunday 14 August 2011

Cowboys and Aliens 2011 review


In a time where I will never know what it must be like to live in New Mexico Territory. A stranger (Sexy ass Daniel Craig) with no memory of his past stumbles into the hard desert town of Absolution. What he discovers the controller of the environment, Colonel Dolarhyde (Also Sexy Harrison Ford). It's a town that lives in fear. The Reject Craig only to be attacked by unworldly forces, he is now they're only hope (saw it coming). As this gunslinger (but not tobacco chewing) slowly starts to remember who he is and where he's been, he realizes he holds a secret that could give the town a fighting chance against the alien force.


Now might be some spoilers in this but trust me that not going to matter in the slightest what is is that you maybe wanting your money back (for the ticket and travel). Firstly the I was left bored from the jump of, the first 25 minutes did nothing for me and although you saw loads of Mr Craig, I didn't fell as though his character was going to develop beyond this. And it didn't. Once I found out that the Aliens where on Earth to gather gold, I was left to make up my own reason as to why they wanted the gold (Not really explained apart from it being said it was valuable to aliens as to humans), No back story on why they were experimenting on humans no nothing. I'm not too sure why I'm writing this as I really don't have much to say that this film truly was a steaming pile of bullshit, that now makes me wonder if Daniel Craig can actually play another character other than James Bond and be good at it out side of his comfort zone. And as for Harrison ford from respecting him as a young Marbie (I'm still young Homosapiens don't get that twisted) watching him as Indiana Jones, to watch him acting as if he is doing improv at a theatre session. Sorry the two big names that were suppose to make this film didn't even make it worth me watching (and I barely did that).


Cowboys and Aliens is what we wanted (No, not really), and that's exactly what we got. Underdeveloped cowboy and Indian characters and an AI, I mean Alien squad that were as smart as any Hill Billy with an up-side down, wordless, picture book. If this is all Hollywood has to offer after the Big BLOCKBUSTER, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows part 2, then this summer I feel sorry for them (Glee 3D? come on now). This film could I admit been a tad bit better with the whole genre-blending they attempted to do, but plastering Big names to a film with no real thought out plot and lack there of character development does not mean your gonna get shit. 


I give this film: A fifth of a star, out of Ten. Save they money to buy some drinks or go see another film, Homosapiens trust me on this one.


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